What Are Some Good Online Dating Icebreakers?

Online dating can be overwhelming and more than a little intimidating for some people and it can be hard to know how to start a conversation. If you are finding it hard to strike up a chat with a potential date, the following post contains some great ice breakers that will help you get the ball rolling.

Introduce Yourself

Send them a light and introductory message to begin with. This doesn’t need to be anything too complicated, just a simple “Hello, My name is…I liked your profile and wondered if you wanted to chat sometime soon?” Relax a little, you have made the first move and just wait for them to respond. It may take them a while to respond, but when they do use some of the following questions to keeps the conversation flowing.

Ask Them about Themselves

Ask them to describe themselves, even if they have given a big description on their profile. Then ask basic questions about their work or if they attend college or university. These initial questions show them that you are interested in them and getting to know them better.

Ask Them about Music

We all love music and if you do you should ask them what they like and their favourite bands or songs. This is a great ice breaker as it a great way to find out immediately if you have any shared interests. You could also ask what kind of films they like, which may prove useful when you reach the physical date stage.

Ask If They Like To Travel

Most people have dreams and aspirations and many have places that they would love to visit or that they may have already visited. As the conversation continues you could ask them if there is one place, more than any other, they would like to visit and why. This is another way to find out if you have any common ground, as they might have the same interest in Italy as you or might have been places you want to visit and can tell you about them.

Ask Them about the Food and Drink They Like

By asking them what kind of food they like cooking, eating and what their favourite restaurants are you are finding out more information about them. It is also a good way to figure out places you could take them if things progress well and you agree to go out on a date.

Good Form in Skype Dating

The incredible advances in software applications have irreversibly changed the nature of dating as we know it. It is now not simply possible, but highly likely to develop and maintain a strong, meaningful relationships via text messages, voice calls and video chats. Skype offers the possibility of not just initiating conversations, but of building up and sustaining a full-blown romantic connection between partners kept apart by geographical distance or life circumstances. 


However, while most Skype users nowadays are technically enlightened enough to set up a date, there is still some unease and uncertainty as to the best way to conduct a liaison via a computer screen. 

Whether in a first date with a particular partner or one of a succession of a long-distance rendezvous, it is worth remembering the romantic nature of the appointment. This means preparing for it with all the anticipation, excitement and attention we reserve for any date with a physically present partner. Choose carefully your clothes, hairstyle and make-up. Arrange the part of the interior that will be visible during the conversation with an awareness of the impression it creates – do you want an overflowing bin or a sink full of dirty dishes to be on display during the conversation? Like a window to your life the screen will provide not only a glimpse of your surroundings, but of your overall personality. At the same time, if you are using Skype to keep a long-term relationship fresh and healthy, it might be a good idea to create intimacy by showing more personal details and more relaxed look – your unmade bed might not be such a bed idea at that stage!

Preparation for the visual aspect of the date is not enough – thinking of the conversation is of huge importance if you are to sustain a connection beyond a basic exchange. In talking to a partner you know well make sure to find a way to express affection in a familiar way, even if the conversation is purely practical. If you are in the stages of getting to know each other, think in advance of topics and areas of interest you want to touch upon during the conversation. Then ask your questions gently and unobtrusively if you feel the interaction is heading towards an awkward pause.

Online Dating Etiquette: Dos and Don’ts

When you first get started with online dating, it is important that you quickly become aware of the proper etiquette that’s normally expected with this type of dating. Dating online is a different experience from dating offline and there are some key differences in etiquette that you ought to follow closely. By doing so, you will give yourself the best chance of interacting well on dating sites and hopefully land some hot dates!

Silent Treatment Is Okay

Offline it can seem quite rude to decide not to respond to someone who indicates that they are interested in you. Usually you would talk a little and then let them know politely and in the gentlest way possible that you’re really not interested. Online it is different. From an etiquette standpoint, the best approach to a potential date contacting you who you don’t find attractive, is to simply not reply. Given how easy it is to communicate online, it can be very hard to disengage from someone once you’ve started to.

Don’t Publish A Non-Genuine Picture Of Yourself

Let’s face it: in dating, the first impression we have of someone is how they look. Online, it is extremely easy to be disingenuous about how you really look by using Photoshop or another person’s photo, in order to be more successful at contacting members of the opposite sex and get noticed. Unfortunately, this inevitably backfires and leaves everyone involved in a worse position than when they started. One of the most sacrosanct parts of online dating etiquette is that you should be honest about how you look. That means using genuine, non-photoshopped photos of yourself taken relatively recently.

Don’t Ask Personal Questions Too Quickly

When meeting someone online it is very easy to start asking them questions in a way that would never do so soon if you met them offline. This is due to online communication having far fewer natural barriers and neither party being able to see body language properly, unless using software like Skype. Asking uncomfortably personal questions too early as you’re getting to know each other should be avoided.

Do Make The First Move

Online you have to be more proactive compared with offline dating situations. This is especially true for women when they see a guy they like. Send them a message and see where it takes you online. It isn’t possible to flirt and send small signal as you would offline, so you need to be a bit more direct!

Dating Red Flags – What Are They?

Online dating can be a great way to meet and date new people, particularly if you find it hard offline or just don’t have the time or circumstances for that to be possible. However, there are people out there who are not as genuine or honest as perhaps you are and in the following article we will look at some of the red flags you should be aware of when it comes to online dating.

No Pictures on Their Profile

If a person you are interested in does not have any pictures on their dating profile or does not want to share any with you without good reason, you should be very cautious. While they might just be shy, the fact they don’t want you to know what they really look like might suggest they are hiding something.

Vague About Their Availability

Obviously the idea of online dating is to start talking to someone and eventually meet them offline. If you are in contact with someone who seems to be doing all they can to avoid that first meet-up, it is most likely that they are hiding something. It could mean that they are married and just playing a game or even worse.

They Ask Personal Questions Too Soon

When you start chatting to someone online, the purpose is to get to know each other’s likes and dislikes and see if you want to take anything further. While it is fine for them to ask basic questions about your life and interests, you should be concerned if they start trying to dig too deep too soon.

They’ve Recently Come out Of a Relationship

If someone says they have just recently come out of a long term relationship, you need to exercise some caution. While it is not necessarily a bad thing that they want to get back into dating so soon after the end of a relationship, it could be a sign that they are not looking for anything too serious and just casual sex.

Endless Texts and Emails

While it can be nice and reassuring to receive texts or emails from someone you have met online, if the texts or emails do not lead anywhere, it could be a bad sign. Much like the dater who keeps putting off meet-ups and physical dates; it could mean that they are already married or in a relationship and just playing a game.

Hopefully, the potential red flags listed above will not put you off pursuing online dating, but will help you avoid making mistakes and getting hurt.

Keeping a girl interested over email

Well the Love Doctor is in Jamie sent us this question:

Hey Love Doctors

I met this super hot girl last Sunday at the book club and we had a fantastic connection. We got on so well that she even volunteered her number and called me.

Problem now is that she is away for two weeks and although she seems really into me she insists that we  correspond by email while she’s in the US; this is something I’m really not keen on as I found it hard to maintain interest just by just writing. 

She wrote me by her own initiative almost instantly after she left, yet she talks pretty much about loads of boring stuff (what she did how the trip is going etc etc). It might be that she just wants to build more comfort but I know that if I go down that route that will kill attraction, especially given that when we met, in her own words, “it felt like a movie”. Yet I somehow think that disappearing completely for two weeks and then calling her out of the blue when she’s back might not be the best option either.

For now I’m just trying to keep emails short, sweet without replying immediately or giving away too much. But any other advice would be welcome.

Cheers Jamie

You've Got Mail

Continue reading